Thursday, October 25, 2018

S1: The Tomb of Horrors (Live Version) -Part Two


Welcome back! When we left off yesterday you had pizza and an easy out. And you didn't take either. I'm not judging you, nimrod.


The Trapped Hallway

A la Donkey Kong Country, the fake out credits run to indicate you've completed Baron Sukumvit's jurisdiction of Acererak's Tomb. But curiosity about what the key you hold is for leads you to search for an antechamber. You're now heading into the untouched portion of the maze where Acererak's skull still remains.

The first (and easiest) encounter is with the infamous pit of spikes, a nasty little trap that looks like an easy climb down/cross the floor/climb up solution. People who have played the module know better. There are two solutions to getting across, and this is the last time that will happen. One requires the player to do a vocal impression of the Prince of Persia. The other is even more surreal, and I won't spoil it here.


The Siren

Probably my favorite encounter. The original siren was a tragic figure of pure intentions. Mine is deliberately left ambiguous. Siren song is notorious for hypnotizing its listener, and she lures you into a false sense of security to the tune of "Part of Your World" from The Little Mermaid.

"Oh you poor dear
Lost in this cave.
Sauntering nearer to glory
  or grave.
Following whispers of treasure
 encased in deceit.
High overhead solace is found
Spirits will tread over delicate ground.
Dancing along through that…

  what’s that word again?"

A. HEAT                                      B. SLEET
C. WHEAT                                  D. MEAT             (and guess which one of these doesn't kill you)

A. "Oh yeah, 'HEAT'.
Up where it's warm. Up where it's bright.
Up where you lay all day in sunlight.
Baking within. Bad for your skin.
That's how you burn..."  Very few people can be hypnotized into roasting to death. Congratulations.

B. "Oh yeah, 'SLEET'.
On with the skates. On with the skis.
Onto the lake where temperatures freeze.
Crack in the ice. Paying the price.
Never return..."  Probably one of my more tragic ending.

C. "Oh yeah, 'WHEAT'.
Out where they plant. Out where they grow.
Out where the harvest races the snow.
Bundled afresh. Into the thresh..."  Even the siren stops singing when she realizes how violent this ending is going to be.

D. "Oh yeah, 'MEAT'.
Cutlets are ground. Sausage is cased.
Scrapple transmogrified from the waste.
Premium grade. How is it made?
Not your concern..."  There are some horrors even Acererak's minions won't delve into.

The Juggernaut of Acererak's Tomb

The original mammoth-like beast of this section of the dungeon rode a massive treadmill and squashed everything in it's path. I think I found a pleasant alternative.

Hi.

Three of these drains prolong disaster.
Three of these drains are fatally placed.
But one of these drains flows right to the throne room.
Now dive in with undo haste
Or else you'll be erased!
Da DA da dada da


You can't see it in the image, but the drains are labeled "Potable", "Nonhazardous", "Decontaminated", and "Inoffensive". If you were paying attention yesterday, then you'd know which way is out. If not, then I guess you have a one in four chance. Much better odds than Acererak gave you.

Return to the Throne Room

You've been to the throne room before, but only the northern half of it. This is the previously inaccessible southern half, complete with a pink horse-thing that hops over to you, backwards no less. Probably my biggest disappointment with nobody making it all the way to this slide was the fact that I took the time to learn how to speak the knight's dialogue backwards. You'll just have to imagine it.

EDIS REHTO EHT OT EMOCLEW.

EMIT EMAS EHT TA UOY KCATTA NAC SECEIP EVIF LLA EREHW TOPS EHT SI TUO YAW EHT.

ENOHP EHT REWSNA I ELIHW EREHT DNATS.



The Demi-Lich

At last you arrive at Acererak's final resting place. Getting the door open is a complicated puzzle that you'll hopefully remember the instructions for (as well as a few words of advice for dealing with the skull itself).

In designing this game I did as much research as my desk job would allow into the history of the campaign, and I came across several interesting tidbits for how past players overcame the various obstacles. In one tournament, the players used a couple of Acererak's own cursed items against him, which left their Dungeon Master speechless. He actually had to call Gary Gygax to come down and make a ruling on whether or not the approach would work. Suffice to say, Gygax was impressed with the players' creativity and ruled in their favor.

While my version is limited to multiple choice, and thus not conducive to a whole lot of freedom, I'm proud to say that I still managed to work in a misdirection to provide a means of both defeating the lich and freeing the hoard of souls he'd acquired. I'll not reveal the solution here, but I will say that it involves a similar appearance by Mr. Gygax (sort of) to reward cleverness, inadvertent though it may be.

Instead I'm going to leave you very near the resolution, in hopes that one day I'll be able to perform the game again, and perhaps you'll be the player to conquer the dungeon once and for all. Until then, enjoy your stay among the other victims who have come and taken residence. You're in plenty of good company.


The necromancer's crypt is a trial. Uh-huh.
Enslaving those who step on the
Wrong tile.
You're in the collection.
Beyond resurrection.
And the souls started chanting some
IN-TER-JEC-TIONS.