Another nanowrimo snippet. I sometimes feel like I accomplish more when Caris and Zel are talking about nothing than when I'm trying to advance the plot.
It’s not to say that Zel isn’t funny. She really is, she’s just not aware of it. Case in point, we were sitting on the curb of one of the New Orleans streets when I turned to her out of nowhere and said “Hey Zel. Knock knock.”
She stared at me, I imagine trying to wrap her head around what I had just placed in front of her. I swear it hadn’t occurred to me that she’d never heard a knock knock joke before; how could it?
“Is something wrong?” she asked me after a moment of internal deba
“It’s a joke,” I told her. “Knock knock.”
“I don’t get it,” she confessed as her confused eyes stared at me in disbelief like I was an elephant in a hat.
“No that’s the set up. I’m knocking on your door.”
“Okay,” she tried to play along by twisted the invisible doorknob and pulling the invisible door inward on its invisible hinges. I stifled the giggle in my chest knowing that my punch line was not going to top the sheer delight of Zelphina.
“No, you’re not supposed to open the door.
“Why? Are you a threat?”
My voice cracked. “No sweetie. It’s kind of a ritual. You’re supposed to say ‘Who’s there’.”
“Don’t I know it’s you?”
“No, it’s not me. I’m actually playing somebody else.”
“So why do I ask who it is instead of just opening the door to find out?”
“No, you want to find out who it is before you open the door.”
“Is there a chance of it being someone unworthy of me answering the door for?”
“No, well knowing you maybe, but here’s how this works. It’s a five line interactive joke. I say ‘Knock knock’. You answer ‘Who’s there?”. My next line is something I claim to be a first name. Then your line is to repeat that name followed by ‘who?’ like you’re asking for the last name as well. And just to avoid this back alley later; if I say something really absurd like ‘University’ the assumption is that you know many many people named ‘University’ and are requesting clarification for which specific acquaintance named ‘University’ has chosen to visit you unexpectedly. And then I deliver the last line which is usually some sort of play on the word I’ve used as the first name.”
Zel’s deadpan expression was as frozen as a streaming video that needed refreshing. “This is a very complicated ritual.”
I nodded. “Yeah, we should probably cover satire after the holidays. So even though the moment has passed shall we try it again?”
“Can I just ask one more question of clarification?”
I’m sure she saw me wince, but I held my disillusioned daycare instructor Barbie smile right where it was supposed to be. “Of course.”
“Is it actually you at the door pretending to be someone else or is it really someone else?”
I sighed. You know those incredibly rare moments where Bert defeated Ernie? That was my mood as I realized whatever joke I had intended to tell had completely slipped out of my grasp, probably running and screaming. I told you Zel was funny.
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